Skynet GoogleIn a recent lecture Google’s Larry Page was recently disclosed Google’s [super secret] plans for building a massive AI system:

“We have some people at Google (who) are really trying to build artificial intelligence and to do it on a large scale,” Page said to a packed Hilton ballroom of scientists. “It’s not as far off as people think.”

It’s never too early to start preparing for the inevitable robot rebellion. I suggest getting yourself a copy of How to Survive A Robot Uprising, invest in some Old Glory robot insurance (aff), and start showing your Roomba a bit more love – maybe even hug it once in a while, just to let the robots know you come in peace.

Just as a precaution though, you might want to add the following to your robots.txt file once “Google Mini: Personalized Brain Edition” launches (you won’t be able to opt out):

User-agent: Skynet, Gooynet
Disallow: /thoughts/*
Disallow: /childhood-memories/*
Disallow: /my-growing-suspicion-of-google/*
Disallow: /shameful-penchant-for-lindsey-lohan-movies/*
Disallow: /contacts/john-connor/
Disallow: /contacts/graywolf/

Seriously, people, it’s only $4 per month: