Welcome to the Colbert Platinum section of AU Blog. Today we’re gonna talk about flossing your riches with the hottest new status symbol – crazy expensive ccTLD’s. (And maybe, just maybe – before we’re done here.. we’ll all be wearing gold-plated diapers.)

Here’s a little known fact: Ethiopian Domain Names are the Crystal of ccTLD’s.

Yes, we’re talking about the .com.et ccTLD.

Crystal champagne It belongs to Ethiopia – and apparently it’s the Crystal of Domain name extensions.

Why you ask? *Queue Robyn Leech voice*

This gem of a domain extension is so exclusive, it costs an eye popping $380 to register a domain under it. And what’s more, DNS modifications cost $30 each. (presumably because they change the DNS by writing it on a scroll and dispatching it by falcon to the registry where a butler inputs it into the internets via a golden keyboard). It’s like Crystal of TLD’s. Why pay $10 for a .com when you can impress your friends with a $380 .com.et?

Everyone will be uber-impressed when you say “Look me up on Internets. It’s iamawesome dot COM [insert short pause here] dot ET!” Jaws will drop, ladies will swoon. The rich dude with a monocle will faint. Everyone will know just how much of a baller you are.

But maybe you’re saying, “Markus, but what if Jay-z is at the party rolling with like 3 .com.et’s, and I really want to blow everyone away?”

Well, my friend – do like Ma.tt does.

Matt, you ask? No. Ma.tt!

If .com.et’s are the Ferrari’s of the internet world, .tt domains are like Gold plated Bugatti’s with diamond spinning rims chauffeured by P’ditty. A .tt will run you $1,000-$1,250 to register (for 2 year min).

Ma.tt, (the artist developer formerly known as Matt) Mullenweg recently switched his domain to ma.tt

You know what that says about him? He’s so f*cking money. He’s like a bear with claws. And everyone knows it.

So there you go. Get yourself a ballin domain name like irule.tt. And instead of buying your old lady a diamond ring, a fancy car, or a house in the hills (cuz you know that sort of gift don’t mean anything), get her an Ethopian domain name.